Is That All There Is?

First, a true American icon has passed. Let's reflect on that for a moment, instead of our petty problems.

Now, onto our petty problems.

First, the cancer thing. Let's clear this one out: As my brother said, so eloquently earlier today ... "It's not really cancer." Which is not exactly true. But sort of. It's the most benign of the malignant cancers [which is sort of like saying how Billy Baldwin is the most normal of the Baldwin brothers.] I got his point. What he was trying to do was to once again disparage one of my achievements. I got cancer and he didn't. Simple jealously.

Can we get back to Bettie Page? Wow. That's all I can say.

Oh yeah, the carcinoid. I suppose I could throw in with all the nutty carcinoid overreactors out there -- that is, the people who seem to take this disease seriously, and want to do a lot of due diligence. But what would that get me? A lot of trouble from my employer insurance company. God forbid.

Personally, I believe that if you even mention the "C" word, you increase your odds of contracting the disease by a factor of five. I've got temporary immunity, I believe, at the present, as Dr. House has shown me that the odds of getting something while you already have something else are the same as the twitty foppy English guy on the show getting laid.

And really, the carcinoid people could do with some better branding. Carcinoid. Sounds like "paranoid" and "carcinoma" did the old hayride bop and had a child. And they named it "Carcinoid!" Neither entirely scary nor a good title for an early sixties surf tune.

So to answer the carcinoidians out there ... the oncologist says no to the drip. Unless it is a drip consisting of 3 parts dry gin and a splash of vermouth. In which case, drip away! But as I have said many times [and may say so less in the future, as I will be down half a lung] "the internet is the playground of the obsessive." And so, gentle readers and lurkers and obsessive compulsives out there, please tread lightly on imaginary artificial turf on the playground surrounding this blog. And do not roughhouse on the monkey bars.